January

It's been a while since I've blogged.  I know.

January has thrown me for quite a loop.  I have been short tempered and eating everything in sight.  No, I'm not pregnant again.  Ironically enough though, a third baby has been heavy on my mind, as I always thought we would have one.  Lately I am not so sure.  I know it's not something I need to make a decision on right now, but I find myself debating back and forth in my head more than once a day.  Transitioning from one to two has been tough on me, but only recently.

I think it's the miserable Minnesota winter.  Just the other day I was rocking Clara to sleep and started thinking about preschool for Lucy this fall.  I have been trying to coordinate with some friends and their kids, and I have decided I just need to decide where I think will be best for Lucy and go with it.  I was imagining myself this fall at each preschool doing the drop off.  I was envisioning myself carrying Clara in the heavy carseat and holding Lucy's hand just to walk back to the car and come back to do it again in a couple of hours.  Then it hit me.  I realized by fall Clara won't be in her infant carrier carseat anymore...Clara will be walking by fall...in fact, she'll be one by July...oh my goodness, she'll be walking and talking...Clara will be halfway to preschool age when Lucy starts!  My babies are getting so big!!

Maybe I will need a third after all.

I am already feeling what I call van envy, though I refuse to ever drive one.  I remind myself constantly that this, right now, is the worst it will ever be as far as loading the girls in and out of the car.  I yearn for doors that open themselves with the touch of a button when I am carrying Clara in her carseat and opening the backseat door while trying to avoid hitting Lucy in the head.  Then, I proceed to lift them both into the car and buckled.  This alone is keeping me from ever wanting the leave the house.  I actually find myself starting to resent my friends for asking me to do things, as I just want to hibernate in my house.  And silence my phone.  I'm such a scrooge all of the sudden.  Winter is really a waste of my time after Christmas is over.

All of my frustration and stress of the month came to a head this past week.  I had my hair done here in town at the beautiful new salon.  I've mentioned before The Style Lounge in Austin, and will do it again.  I was happy to support the talented women who make that place wonderful.  After trying something new with my hair, I came home and had a minor (okay, major) meltdown.  The hardest thing for me was to call and admit that I didn't like it, and they were gracious enough to fix it for me.  (Thank you, again, Monica, for watching Lucy so I could do thia).  Nothing can calm me down like a trip to the salon.  Lucy joined Clara and I at the end of the process, and the owner Lindsey caught this moment for me.

Yes, much happier and more relaxed.  Even with both of the girls on my lap.

The past two weekends in a row we've had friends come to visit and it has been wonderful.  I love when Wisconsin comes to me every once in a while.  We've had weekends full of big meals, football and naps.  Now that my GetFit challenge has started I haven't been especially good about how I've been eating, but I have been hitting the gym more often.  And loading the kids in the car. Ugh.

Today, the girls and Tony all took a nap at the same time.  It was amazing.  It was like I was home alone, left to be productive.  I started and completed a ruffle toddler apron that was custom ordered for my Etsy shop and I'm very proud of it. 

 That would be the highlight of my day, but then Tony and Lucy were playing and he got a bloody nose.  After stuffing it with toilet paper, Lucy insisted her nose was bleeding too.  So, here it is, the highlight of my day...maybe even the month....